A Heartbroken Vtuber: Mourning the Loss of a Role Model and Trust
In the world of VTubing, we find heroes. We find people who inspire us not just with their content, but with their kindness, their warmth, and the sense of belonging they create. For me, one of those people was Sinder.
She was this incredible figure — a fiery, lovable hellhound who made so many of us feel like we mattered. Her streams were safe havens where bad days melted away into laughter, community, and a sense of being seen. She wasn’t just a talented creator; she was someone we respected deeply, admired for her energy, her openness, and the welcoming space she created.
But in less than 48 hours, that image has shattered.
Now, this was a very weird article for me to write, because I don’t get involved in these things and I prefer not to because… honestly, I don’t want drama finding me or being attacked later on… but this subject was a bit touchy and I wanted to express how I feel as a fan…
So this is purely written as someone who admired her, looked up to her, and was a fan of Sinder. I do not have any personal association with her… purely a heartbroken fan… and writing about it was the only way I could express my sadness since my family looked at me weirdly when I tried to explain why I felt disappointed in a live2D character…
The recent unfolding drama involving Bao, Nanoless, Sinder, and so many more — the accusations and hurt that have come to light- have left many of us stunned, heartbroken, and frankly, lost. It’s not just “drama.” It’s betrayal. It’s watching someone you believed stood for kindness and loyalty reveal a side you never wanted to believe existed.
We always tell ourselves not to put creators on pedestals. And while most of us didn’t, it’s still painful when someone you genuinely looked up to within the vtubing community falls short of the values they once seemed to represent.
I may not have been the loudest supporter in her community, not a long-standing pup waving a Sinder flag from the front rows, but that didn’t make the disappointment any easier.
You don’t have to be a “day one” fan to feel gutted when someone you respected and someone who could have been such a powerful positive voice for the vtubing community lets you down, and for them to only show a very different face behind the scenes.
And while anger, devastation, and heartbreak are normal reactions, there’s also a deep sadness-sadness that someone with so much influence, so much potential to uplift, instead used that power to hurt others from behind the screen.
The situation with Nanoless, the broken friendships, the alleged betrayals behind the scenes, and most painfully, Sinder’s silence on the matter, have only fueled confusion, anger, and grief within the community.
While Sinder has yet to address her connection to these events, particularly concerning Red and everything swirling around it, her fans are left to piece together a story from scattered fragments and hurt voices.
We are left to make our own assumptions.
And what’s perhaps even more devastating is being abandoned in the dark by someone you trusted to lead with honesty.
Someone who built a community on love, only to now let it fracture without a single word.
I know that others out there are feeling even worse than I am; I’ve seen the comments… people are destroyed by this, and it is truly upsetting. Because the truth is, content creators, no matter how large or small, need to understand that we are not just “fans.” We are not just nameless faces lurking in chat, sending emotes and cheers into the void.
We are a community that loves you, supports you, and looks up to you for guidance. We find strength in the spaces you build. We find role models in the kindness you show.
This kind of hurt doesn’t just impact the vtubing world, it can happen in any corner of the streaming and content creation space. That’s why all creators, regardless of their size, must remember the responsibility they carry.
They must do better. Be kinder. Not only to their fans, but also to their friends and peers behind the scenes.
The vtubing community already fights so hard to be a place of positivity, creativity, and acceptance in a world that too often looks down on us. Having one of our bright voices fall so painfully, so disappointingly… cuts deeper than words can say. It reinforces every negative stereotype we try so hard to fight against.
And worse still, it damages how we approach future friendships within this space.
When trust is broken so brutally, it makes creators and fans alike more guarded, more fearful.
It becomes harder to form genuine connections, make true friendships. Harder to believe that kindness is real…
The open-hearted spirit that makes vtubing so magical dims, replaced with doubt and caution… I already have such a hard time making friends within the space… and I am a very tiny streamer compared to my idols… but I desire to form connections and find forever-lasting friendships.
How do we open ourselves up when even the creators we once admired can let us down?
Sinder brought a lot of light to many of us. She brought laughter, comfort, and community.
Now, we are left questioning whether the connection we felt was ever truly mutual. Was it all just a weird game… or did it mean something to her, to have so many people admire her, look up to her… was it all just a twisted game for fame?
This isn’t just about gossip. This is about trust. About the pain of seeing a role model fall… About the cracks left behind in a community that needed her to be better.
We mourn the Sinder we thought we knew. I mourn the safe spaces that feel a little colder now… I mean for me, the tubing community is home… I became a vtuber because it made me feel safer, complete, and welcomed…
And until she speaks, until she chooses transparency over silence, I think many of us will remain heartbroken, betrayed, and forever changed.
And when she does speak… will we listen, will sadness turn into anger?
How do we heal as a community, whether you are a long-standing fan or someone who just passed by and saw the drama… how do we do better towards newer vtubers, or long-standing heroes?
Lots of Love
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